Intentional Tragedies

The events in life that take place suddenly without any pre-amt thought are labeled as accidents, and those events taking course with knowingly outcomes are intentions. Accidents can be avoided but they can’t be prevented! Intentions can be prevented and be avoided.

In our political culture, there is hardly any leader who thrives on good intentions. Three elements in our country’s political chain are synonym; power, authority and misuse. A leader here is defined as one who has all the resources available to him, has people positioned at right places to manipulate at right times, has the uncanny ability to change stance whenever and wherever it pleases and suits his interest.

Most of the political figure of present era we face each day have intentions not compatible with interest of a common man so what they think benefits their personal gains, they intend to achieve. For the purpose of the same, the only way to reach the goals, power becomes their tool. Once getting there, they get authority to manipulate all the rules and regulation coming their way, weather it is constitutional or legal.

The reasons given every time something done at government level, weather be it taxation, price hike of any basic amenity of the common man they justify it “in the interest of the nation” pretext or that “we have taken some painful decision for better future”.

It is a common practice for the so called “ruling class” to ask for big sacrifices from the common man, and when sacrificing their own interest comes into focus ,the privileges are strongly demanded. In the most toughest and trying times the nation faces, they are “the only” cool customers, unnerved, unperturbed by the events. Because even in the worst case scenario, they have the tickets ready all the time to “fly away” to their “home land”.

Time comes and goes. Tragedies occur, mistakes made, but what is learnt from them always remains a big question mark in our politics. For me what has been observed, they never learn for the bad days they leave behind to moan. And history repeats itself for the better, and who benefits this time around is the lone common man. so he thanks almighty for the relief he was waiting for because it is him, who controls every event, every moment. He has given wisdom to mankind but he waits until they poorly and rarely use it.

The one and only reason which is clearly visible to naked eye and mind is the wrong notion of remaining at self created throne for ever and more. Refusing to believe that like every other thing in this universe, culminating to its fateful end, the people placed in power must reach their demise. Now it is upto them to choose between the gallows or the glory!

Happily Ever After

There was a time when getting married was considered a moral obligation and a part of cultural dignity. The male part was taken as a symbol of responsibility and security whereas female was taken as a beatification sign and domestic strength. Long and time-consuming efforts were done to get a pair in making, with the groom’s family visiting the bride-to-be's family, presenting themselves as a best match for the girl. Picture-sharing was the typical presentation formula for both the boy and girl. It was almost impossible for the future life partner to see each other before legally married.

Marriages solemnized during that era were taken as long-term, never-ending relations, where family values, mutual respect and loyalties held the relation together and ever stronger. Personal gains and interest always stood last. The foremost issue had been the happiness and interest of family. Eating together was considered as a sign of ever-growing prosperity. The grandchildren were always the apples of the eye for aging parents. In-laws were loved, cared for and respected as real parents.

But as they say good things always change with time. Values change. Cultural polarization brought change in the thought process. People changed. Values which were once considered against the religion and culture are being taken as a need of time. Traditional inter-family marriages are taken over by inter-cultural marriages. Language, cast, creed and religion remain no bar. The one reason which has brought such a drastic change has been education. Not only it widened thought process but also played a key role in giving new meaning to relationships.

The other reason which played significant role has been ever-blooming electronic media. Talk shows portraying women liberty, working women, movies of different cultures, fashion shows and of course the dramas. Men and women working side by side, getting basic as well as higher education at same institute removed any prohibition which once were significant part of cultural values.

Choosing life partner in such setting has become more common. Still, the parents have to be involved, as we still value our culture and respect elders to some extent. But after getting married, the picture starts to get more clearer, as many issues start creeping into social life. Most common of these is the failure of the new bride to accommodate the in-laws in her life. If she is working, then it is more than complicated. There develops a failure to balance new relations in life. In a culture that we are in, it is not very difficult to understand that parents are to be cared for, loved and respected. This goes for both man and woman. The outcome of such a scenario has a two-prongs effect; either the young lady slowly starts understanding her role and adjusts in new family setup or totally ignores it, making life a bit hard for herself and for her husband. The former situation brings about a better and positive change whereas the latter has all the negative possibilities in offing.

So when we start analysing, it is not very difficult to conclude that the culture and tradition we are brought up has its values different than what is being depicted as modern era needs. The new generation will not have much of a problem in finding a solution. The only thing needed for them to do is to just recall how their parents got along together so many years, loving and caring for each other, bringing up the kids and caring for aging parents. It requires sacrifices from both partners and compromise few times, here and there.

This approach has all the ingredients for what we call long term relations, because no other way one can have a happy life. It’s a give and take attitude which bears fruit of fulfillment, and most of it is giving rather than taking which is more satisfying…

Think Twice!

None of us can deny that they love shopping and getting themselves some new garments, furniture items, kitchen ware etc. but who can claim they are the best shoppers! you can get your self- assessment by going through the following. We can categorize consumers into four different classes:

Class 1: They are the ones who don’t have expenditure limitations. They have a what we call shopaholic nature. Choosing expensive outlets is their target. They look for the most expensive price tag of the items they like, even if cheaper ones are available. To bargain is not in their vocabulary. Not to bargain is what they call is a status symbol. As for the seller, they are the best bargain of the day. They sell may be the most average items for the top price… may be at a few soft drinks cost!

Class 2: They go around shopping with wallet full of cash and with mind full of sense. They know before hand what to buy and the budget for it. They have lot of time and money available to them to shop around, select the best item and buy! As for the cost they put their own price tag! But they are most difficult of customers from the seller’s view. He can’t get much out of their wallets... talking about some extra bucks! So no soft drinks to offer.

Class 3: Their sense of shopping is primarily dictated by the capacity of the wallet and it is has limits! So they go on purchasing on daily or thrice weekly basis. To safe some money is the prime rule. Bargaining they do, but if it doesn’t work, they sacrifice quality to still safe something for tomorrow! And from sellers view they get good sale from this group, because cheaper items come much cheaper, be it grocery, fruits, furniture or electronics etc.

Class 4: This is the class of people that doesn’t shop because they have to earn their living today. They can only go for getting their necessities, the next day. Happy-go-lucky, they are.They toll hard all day long, with no worries at all for the coming day. They are the surviving ones -- the majority in our cultural set up! All they need is two meals a day, a place to sleep and some work for they next day. When they go shopping they aren’t any worry to seller.

So, if you are among the top three, don’t think you are very lucky, think about the unlucky ones; someday that can make you very lucky!

Make A Choice

Life has adopted a great change in how it takes issues in their perspective. What was important has become of secondary significance. Earlier, education, health and family were the utmost part of ones life. Now career, job and making money has taken over a major chunk. A child gets sick and parents are more worried about the test the next day rather than seeing him get well soon. As early as 3 years, a toddler looks tense watching faces of both parents sitting with him at physician’s chamber, the physician himself observes the younger one with grave concern of what is to become of him/her in the coming years. Nothing can change what ideology the parents are carrying in upbringing their child. Most of the time it is fixed and locked. It doesn’t matter how much the physician tries to reason with parents to the approach with which they are handling their offspring at this early age is going to have damaging effects on his intelligence as well as confidence level.

Like a tired horse, or heated auto engine which needs rest, a human being when sick, should rest to regain strength, and time of cooling at all cost. But the hindrance in following such an advise is the level of competition prevailing. We can live and run our lives with better achievements if we draw a line. A child should be dealt like one. He/she must live free of all worries, study, play and sleep as they please. And when not well, healthwise rest in bed; no exam, no test!
In most of the cases, you don’t get a positive response from the parents to let go and ease out a bit on a child who has just started to make assessment of what is going on around him -- good, the bad and the ugly -- rather, they put him to stressful test and an exam forced upon him. As research has proved just recently that early childhood self-learning has tremendous results and that anything new that has access to the brain of a child will be everlasting. So its quite clear that teaching done under stress or coercion will not get the required results from a child. An adult can handle any stress but a young child cannot! Let them fall a few times, they will learn to stand... on much firmer grounds.
For the much older group of children, when sick there can one of several ways to give the child the physical rest he needs and maintaining his academic activities all the while. This can easily be achieved with the co-ordinated link between parents and the school management. One of two simplest ways to attain this can either be a continuous contact between classmates or the affected child and teachers. The benefits of such an action will be two-fold: it will allow the child stipulated rest advised by pediatrician, yet keep him abreast of educational activities at school hence removing all the stress.
The parents hold the key role in making the right choice.